V-Day Special: Our diversity attracted us to one another - Sreejita De, Michael Blohm Pape

Popular television actress Sreejita De tied the knot with her beau Michael Blohm Pape last year in July. The couple had white wedding and Hindu ceremony as well. It is their first Valentine’s Day after marriage and in an exclusive conversation with Adgully, they share their thoughts on love, relationships and much more.

Sreejita and Michael are yet to complete first year of their marriage, so when asked if they think the definition of love has changed for them, post their marriage, Sreejita says, “For me it has not changed at all. I feel the same kind of excitement as it was for the first year of our dating. Going out for dates is exactly the same, I feel extremely special, I also make sure that I treat him like a special person. It has not changed much, but I think I have become more responsible, I have more authority over him in a positive way.”

Michael adds here, “Yes, I agree with Sreejita, the definition of love has not changed a bit, but that whole feeling of being together has somehow increased. I don’t know if it makes sense, but now we are officially a family. It feels nice and complete. I was sure and secure about Sreejita before, but it is a different feeling now.”

After dating each other for a few years, it was Michael, who had decided for this surprise romantic proposal in front of the iconic Eiffel Tower in Paris. Remembering that, Sreejita reveals, “It was of course a surprise for me. I had no clue, was not prepared. I wanted him to propose to me for a long time. It was one of the most memorable nights for me in my whole life. It was unbelievably romantic.”

Michael says, “I think you were waiting for a long time that you almost stopped expecting it. That is exactly the point I wanted to reach. I wanted it to be unexpected that the surprise factor adds a lot of excitement. I think it should not be staged. I don’t believe in those things like both partners know about it. Though it was simple, I agree that it was one of the best nights we have ever had. It was extremely cold outside, but we were still sweating.”

When asked whether during courtship they had done any crazy things for one another, Sreejita replies, “I think we both are crazy in our own ways. I believe every day you should do something crazy, not just once in a lifetime. Something crazy should happen every now and then to keep the mood of the relationship uplifted. However, I think proposing to me in front of the Eiffel Tower is one of the good, crazy things Michael has done.”

Michael says, “Sreejita is a crazy person herself. So, being with you is a crazy thing. You will never know what will happen during the day when you are living with her.”

Have there been any difficult moments in their relationship like other couples faces? Sreejita says, “I honestly did not find any day or part difficult, there are ups and downs in every relationship. But we always make it a point that we are holding each other’s hand, whether it is an uphill or downhill task. But I don’t think we faced any difficult part, so far.”

Michael replies, “Fights, for example, belong to every relationship, if you do not know how to fight with each other, then you would not know how to love each other. So, knowing how to fight is very important, we have a very good understanding of that. We would never go to sleep with bad feelings, this is a rule which we have, we try to patch up before sleeping. Every couple fights, but we hardly fight and when we do, we know how to resolve it.”

In every relationship there are some funny moments, recalling some such moments Michael shares, “I want to tell you, we clicked this picture, where you put this lipstick mark on my hand, you held my hand and clicked a picture of it. Somehow you posted it in your story. It created quite a buzz and I was not expecting anything like that. Though, I do not care about all these things, but it was quite funny because people were like who is that person?”

Sreejita chimes in, saying, “But I felt right at that moment. My funniest experience would be the first gift I gave him on Valentine’s Day. He never used it or wore it, I don’t know for what reasons, he says that it doesn’t fit him.”

Michael answers it and says, “So, she bought a cap, it was very nice and looked good. But I think you tried it on yourself and you thought ‘oh it is nice! goes well’. But you did not keep this in mind that my head is slightly bigger than yours. It simply did not fit. It looked so stupid and unfortunately, I never ended up wearing it. I still have it, as it is a very special and precious gift for me.”

Quizzing them about who is more romantic between the two, Sreejita quickly admits it is her and says, “I think I am the most romantic person because women in general show their love more, not that men love less. They are less expressive than women, obviously we consider expressing love most romantic.”

Michael agrees and says, “Right, I will also say that Sreejita is a more romantic person than me. I will not say that I am not romantic by heart. You make me very comfortable and I am learning these things now when I am with you. These romantic gestures and all, it does not come naturally to me. But it doesn’t mean I am not romantic.”

Sreejita says, “I would say he is quite romantic. I have seen him sometimes trembling, kind of a little sweaty, shivering when he is very emotional about certain situations like when he proposed to me. So, these kinds of expressions only come when you are romantic.”

Michael and Sreejita belong to diverse cultures, but it is not a difficult task for both of them to adjust with one another. Michael explains the reason behind it and says, “People expected it to be very difficult, but it is not. I think opposites attract each other, or in our case I will say we complement each other. Our diversity attracted us. Now that we are husband and wife, of course, we are slightly different, we have different backgrounds. We grew up in different cultures, we perceive things differently. However, I have learnt so much from her and hope she has also learnt something from me.”

Sreejita says, “Very well said by Michael, there is so much to learn as we come from different backgrounds and cultures. Every time I go to his home in Germany, I learn more about food, how it is to celebrate Christmas with my in-laws. There is so much to know. He is also inquisitive. He shows a lot of interest towards our culture, customs, festivals, religion, entertainment industry, actors and anything related to India. He is very open and constantly learning new things. It is actually an exciting factor that we have learned so much from each other.”

All relations face difficult situations in course of time, but the newly married pair has their own solution to face it, Sreejita says, “I think there is no difficult part as long as you are willing to understand one another. Difficulty lies when we become so rigid about our own self or about our own beliefs, thoughts. We are not flexible to understand another person’s opinion. It is all about flexibility and understanding each other. Maybe a little bit of adjustment here and there. I can say that we are very much on the same page. Easy part to solve everything is through unconditional love.”

Speaking on this, Michael says, “First of all, do not expect that the other person is exactly like you. That would be very boring. Most important part for me is that you should be good at communicating. If you are good at talking and not listening, then that is a big problem. So, the difficult part is if you don’t listen to your partner then it is not good. You always don’t have to be on the same page, that willingness to adjust, and understanding other people’s point of view is a first step. Then you have to adjust and find a common ground. If you manage to do that then everything becomes easy. If you do not do that then people start having misunderstandings.”

According to Sreejita, the dynamics of their lifelong partnership has not changed even after the wedding. The actress says, “Absolutely not, it becomes more intensified – you care, do everything with each other way deeper. After marriage, you feel like a complete family. I think love increases. The only thing that changes is my name.”

Michael says, “See if you have a good base then these feelings intensify, I don’t think dynamics have changed. This feeling of togetherness has increased and strengthened our bond. Something I can say is that Sreejita has gone into housewife mode, cooking, kitchen duties and why your wet towel is lying here and all. It is in a good way. It is a proper home, where we as a couple and family stay together. It is a holy place now.”

Both of them express that it’s not important for them to celebrate Valentine’s Day on a particular day. As Michael states, “We don’t need an occasion to celebrate our love. It is like pressure when it comes to Valentine’s Day for some people. They are like I don’t have a Valentine this year and God! What will I do? If you have such expectations on certain days, then there is something wrong. However, it is nice to have a day if people need that to give time to each other. Go for dinner or do whatever they enjoy. I think that is what we will do. We will have some dinner, spend time with each other, no phones, no work just you and me. I think that is a good occasion to take that time. I don’t think we specifically celebrate it on this day. We have many Valentine’s Day throughout the year. I am not saying it is not important, but love should be there for the entire year.”

Sreejita reveals their plans and says, “We celebrate it whenever we can. This year, we will have some candles, dinner, dance, music and love.”